For a few years during my professional life, all I could think and talk about was change. I was working on a global initiative implementing change management efforts and supporting thousands of people through it. At the same time, I was going through several abrupt changes myself. I started to crave stability, something certain, some control. I worked hard to find that stability, cultivated it and was extremely grateful for it. As soon as I felt comfortable in it, I wanted to change again. Sound familiar?
Fast forward 10 years later, the dilemma has not changed much, especially during the pandemic, where this seems to be a recurring theme. Only that now it’s not so much a question of years or months, but rather weeks and days.
During these years, however, I’ve learned a few things:
Lesson #1. Change is a process
Even when it happens externally overnight, as humans we need a period to digest it. Come to terms with it. Make meaning out of it. This is a video that I found helpful to remind myself of that process.Lesson #2. Change is the only constant in life
As the Greek philosopher Heraclitus stated over 2.500 years ago, this quote remains true to this day. No matter what we do, what we believe, what we feel, change is the only thing we know is going to be there, no matter what.Lesson #3. Stability is necessary
Like it or not, routines and schedules support expectations and patterns that are important for mental health. They restore a sense of normalcy, controllability, and predictability. As Gustave Flaubert said, “Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work”.Lesson #4. Stability is in you
I firmly believe that no matter what is going on in the outside world, stability is born and found within. I have to admit, I am still working on this one through meditation, finding peace and stillness. I can only say at this point that it has been a long but rewarding journey.Lesson #5. Change and stability are two sides of the same coin
Rather than seeing this as a problem to solve, I now see this as a polarity to be managed. The difference lies in that in a problem a solution exists - there can be a right or best answer. In a polarity, there is a dilemma that is ongoing, unsolvable and contains seemingly opposing ideas.
So rather than trying to figure out whether it’s time for change or stability I now think of it as a constant interaction between change and stability where both co-exist and sometimes they are in balance and sometimes one needs to be prioritised over the other. For now, I’ve settled for accepting both in my life, as a continuous dance of opposites.
References & going further